Title: The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide To Personal Freedom
Author: Don Miguel Ruiz with Janet Mills
Genre: Self-help and Personal growth
The four agreements book is a self-help guide to attain personal freedom. We all have some self-limiting beliefs that make our lives challenging and stop us from reaching our full potential. A child believes that they can achieve anything they want in their lives, and then, this grown-up adult starts filtering out everything as possible and impossible. Filters increase with our age, and we often end up adding too many things to “the impossible list. ” The book took inspiration from the spiritual ideas of the ancient Toltec people.
What we do in our lives is driven by the set of agreements we have made with ourselves, others, god, or with life. We have the potential to change our life and fulfill our dreams, but the agreements imposed by society or the ones driven by fear are the killer of personal joy and freedom.
These agreements that are often fear-based make our life miserable by dwindling self-worth and causing unnecessary suffering. These agreements play an important role in deciding what is possible and what’s not.
So, the author proposes four agreements that an individual can make with oneself. These four agreements can improve your life regardless of external circumstances.
The Four Agreements:
Agreement 1: Be Impeccable With Your Word:
The author believes it to be the most difficult to follow. Speak with integrity, and don’t use words against yourself or someone else. Use your words wisely and use them in the direction of truth and love.
Agreement 2: Don’t Take Anything Personally
The author talks about our experiences with different people and how what they say impacts our lives. An individual must not lose their self-worth and identity by relying on the opinions of others. Each one of us has different perspectives on life and circumstances. So, what others say or do is a reflection of their identity. Stop taking things personally, and you’ll notice an improvement in your life.
Agreement 3: Don’t Make Assumptions
Making assumptions is probably one of the most common characteristics of a human being. Here the author says that the assumptions cause unnecessary suffering. We end up imagining so many things that result in conflicts, misunderstandings, and stress. Communicating and asking questions can protect our relationships and bring peace. Have the courage to ask questions and get rid of unnecessary drama, sadness, and misunderstandings.
Agreement 4: Always Do Your Best
Self-judgment, self-abuse, and regret can upset our mental health. We might function at our 100 % on a few days and 70, 40, or 20 % on the other. So, avoid self-judgment, always give your best, and your best can change according to your circumstances. Healthy or sick, always give your best(without being harsh on yourself) and love yourself. This agreement is also a part of self-love, understanding yourself and your needs.
You can finish this book on a weekend. The four agreements can bring significant changes in your life. You may find it challenging in the first few days to implement it. So, paste them somewhere as a note. Practice daily, and you’ll see how your relationships improve with yourself and others. Also, check out our post on Mental diet and how simple changes can help you live a healthy happy life.